Irresistible Ruination

Tonight I'm just feeling devastated by this book I've been reading - (see Irresistible Revolution).  Frankly I've been reluctant to read more because I'm my worldview is being so challenged by what I'm reading.

In his book Shane talks a lot about how Jesus lived and contrasts it with the way so many Christians live here in the USA.  We're steeped in consumerism so deep we don't even realize how thickly it dictates our lives.  Here's a quote that really hit me hard:

"I'm convinced that God did not mess up and make too many people and not enough stuff.  Poverty was created not by God but by you and me, because we have not learned to love our neighbors as ourselves." - Shane Claiborne

In my closet I have 10 pairs of shoes.  Bike shoes, 4 pair of dress shoes for work, running shoes, slippers, loafers, hiking boots, and a pair of cowboy boots.  And in this world there are many more people than I want to think about who would be happy to have just one pair of shoes.  I have shirts in my closet that haven't been worn in years, and there are those who would be happy to have just one good shirt to wear.

I live with my wife in a house with 4 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms.  It is stuffed to the gills with all of our possessions and we've been wishing we had a bigger house with more space for more stuff.  And in Houston tonight 10,000 people sleep on the streets because they have nowhere to go.

So I can see this huge gap between the way I live and the way those in poverty and homelessness live.  And my brain is regurgitating all the cultural excuses my middle class upbringing has given me all 40+ years of my life.  And I'm seeing them as the thinly veiled excuses I use to ignore the problems and enjoy the privileges.  So now what the hell do I do?  This gap between what I am and what I should be is HUGE.  It's overwhelming.  Where do I even begin to seek forgiveness for my own blindness?  How do I start to get free of all my possessions and the consumer culture which seems to own my soul?

The answer is love.  I need to start there - I need to reach out to those who are poor and not just as a project.  I need to build relationships with them.  I need to LEARN from them - not teach them.  Where do I start, Jesus?  Where do I begin?